Question: Beloved Osho, The first days i was here with you, i felt only sheer delight, joy, love and gratitude. Now a coolness is there that scares me. From an attitude of wanting to jump up and down and clap my hands in delight, i now feel less excited. Osho, my beautiful master, i do feel my heart beating with yours — and i feel separate. How can i let you penetrate me more, become each breath that i take, part of my very cells? How can i open more to you so that you can penetrate my being totally, so that i can taste more of your silence? Osho, just writing now, there is no coolness, only tears in my eyes, love in my heart, and anguish.
Osho – It is something to be understood by all, that excitement is not the goal of spiritual growth. Excitement cannot be eternal, it will be tiring. Whenever something new happens there will be excitement because it is new, but the excitement has to disappear into a calmness, coolness. Coolness can be eternal because coolness is rest.
But there is some fear attached with the word `coolness’. It reminds one of coldness. Coolness is not coldness. Languages develop in different geographical regions, so remember it. In the West, a warm reception seems to be perfect, but not in Bombay — here a cool reception with cold drinks will be more appropriate. In our minds these connotations of words cling.
Excitement seems to be equivalent to ecstasy; it is not. Excitement is a state of tension; it feels good because the old is disappearing and the new is coming in. A new breeze, a new experience — it is good to welcome it with an excited heart. But jumping up and down continuously, the guest will think you are mad; that much excitement is found only in mad asylums. When the guest comes it is good — one jump, a good hug — but continuously jumping and hugging, the guest may run out of the house shouting, “Save me, I have entered in a wrong house! Is that man mad or what?”
Excitement is only a welcome, but the welcome is not the whole story. Then coolness has to come, and coolness is far deeper, far more valuable than any excitement can be.
So jumping up and down has to stop.
Sit silently, be calm and cool.
Ecstasy is coolness, it is not excitement.
If you accept coolness, then only will the deeper experience of coolness give you the experience of ecstasy.
It will be full of life, but not childish.
It will be full of joy, but with a deep contentment.
The joy will not be against sadness, the joy will be beyond sadness.
But in the beginning this kind of thing happens to everybody. When you enter meditation it is great excitement. And then things start settling — which is natural, that’s how it should be. When they start getting natural and settled, you can be worried that perhaps you are losing — where is that excitement? A few people are running after excitement. One wife will not do; get a divorce. For a few days the second wife will be an excitement, but only for a few days. Even if it is a few days, it is more than enough. Yes, somebody else’s wife is always an excitement. If you want excitement then always look at somebody else’s wife — just don’t torture your wife. With your wife learn to be calm and quiet and cool, which are deeper and more valuable experiences.
Excitement is childish. Be more mature. Be a little more alert, centered, and your coolness will become ecstasy. But wait; waiting is the price one has to pay for it. Otherwise, people are living in excitement — from this film to that film, from this circus to that circus, from this teacher to that teacher, from this religion to that religion. So for a moment there is excitement…. It is something like itching: it feels good, but don’t scratch too much; otherwise you will bloody yourself.
But the whole world has been trained for excitement, because excitement is a commodity which can be sold; more exciting things can always be brought to you. Coolness is not a commodity. Excitement is a commodity, a very cheap thing. And those who are with me should be aware to drop all cheap things. Live the precious, the valuable, the eternal.
Coolness is perfectly good, far better than your excitement. And if you can remain cool then coolness will deepen, and the depth brings ecstasy. That is a totally different dimension. Never misunderstand excitement for ecstasy. Ecstasy is absolutely cool, eternally cool, abysmally cool.
Source – Osho Book “The Osho Upanishad”